Thursday, March 11, 2010

Fast or Slow, I Can't Decide

I happened to look at the IVF countdown and was hit with a mix of emotions. First came shock that in almost 2 months we will be starting our 3rd and final cycle. How did time move by so quickly? And then I started thinking about what all has to happen in between now and that cycle and it seems like forever away. How can I have two wholly different emotions over the same amount of time? I'm excited to try again but scared because it's our last time. I want more time to try naturally but am frustrated that natural is still not working and want to get to IVF. Oh if you all could read my mind right now you all would be totally confused too, I'm sure. I think overall I'm afraid to hope and scared that we could have a repeat of last time but excited for the opportunity to try...yep, still confused. *sigh*

5 comments:

Hillary said...

I can definitely relate to those mixed feelings of excitement and fear...I feel like that with every IF treatment. But I'm sure those feeling get intensified with each passing one...*sigh* Praying for you, friend.

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Jesse and Mandy Peterson said...

I understand. But I'll be excited, and wholly excited, on your behalf.

Hope and a Future said...

I feel exactly the same way! My FET us the end of this month and I know it is my last try. I will be praying for you that it works for you this time, and you get some frosties for later.

JB said...

I had enormous trepidation before my last IVF cycle. I knew it was the last one we would do with my eggs, so part of me was glad to get it over with so we could move on to donor IVF if that's what was warranted, but a bigger part of me was terrified that it wouldn't work and we would close the door on using my eggs. It's nearly impossible to feel settled when it seems so much is riding on an upcoming event. But you have a lot going for you, and lots of support, so try to just let it happen. You've done all you can do and the rest is up to your RE and fate. Whatever happens, you and the hubby will be okay. (And if this is *the* cycle, as I dearly hope it will be, you will be more than okay!)

The Heald Family said...

I just came across your site, and I wanted to leave a comment to let you know I will be praying for you guys.

Stay positive, God has a plan for you both.