Monday, August 22, 2011

Cut-Off

So let me catch you all up:

  • 11dp3dt, Thursday August 18 - I had to go on a business trip to the middle of no where and left the day before which I was not happy about. Especially considering that 12dp3dt was when I suddenly started bleeding with our last IVF cycle. So imagine my distress when the day begins with major cramping and all my symptoms disappear (except for vein-y bbs and my crazy sense of smell.) Later that night I went to the bathroom discovered a streak of brown on the TP when I wiped. For most women they would think maybe it was implantation but because this was the day before our bleeding from last time I went into freak out mode which was enhanced by my being alone in the middle of podunk-ville USA. I could not get a hold of Hammer who was out with his friends but did get a hold of my mom who talked me down from the ceiling. Shortly after I was able to sk.ype with Hammer and just seeing his face and my sweet puppy helped tremendously.
  • 12dp3dt, Friday August 19 - This was my last day out of town. The symptoms were still gone (minus my vein-y bbs) but the cramping and spotting were gone too. Somehow I survived and drove as fast as I dared to get myself back home.
  • 13dp3dt, Saturday August 20 - Hammer and I decided to test this morning. We just couldn't stand it anymore. I took an internet cheapy (no I still have not learned) out and did the deed in a cup. The control line came up but there was no sign of a positive. I sighed and said, "As I expected," but then decided to just use the last FRER up because why not and the internet ones suck. So I dipped and while putting the cap on to my shock a positive line came up right away. I cocked my head and said, "Not what I expected." I crawled into bed and told Hammer that we had a faint line. Really it wasn't faint, it was pretty visible but was it hcg going up or coming down? Then later that day the brown spot on the TP was back. Crap. Hammer and I went out shortly after to pick up more HPT, you know, just in case.
  • 14dp3dt Sunday August 21- I woke up at 4 am and 'held it' as long as I could stand until about 4 am. Then I took another FRER. The line wasn't coming up as fast, just as I expected, a chemical pregnancy. I crawled back into bed and woke Hammer up to tell him but he wanted to see for himself so he got up and took a look at the test. He came out looking quizzical, "It looks the same to me." "Well same isn't better" I told him but looked at it again. Holy Pete it might actually be a bit darker. We spent about 10 minutes comparing lines from yesterday and walked away convinced it was darker.
  • 15dp3dt Monday August 22 (beta day) - I woke up around 4 am again after a night of vivid dreams about all sorts of silly things. I talked my self back to sleep but not before noticing that those darn suppositories were making a mess again. When I couldn't stand it any longer I got up about the same time as yesterday (6 am) and got out my supplies. But to my horror I saw that my pad was soaked with a mixture of suppository gunk and brown discharge and there was a lot. I freaked out a bit which woke up Hammer, cleaned myself up and then took the test. I told Hammer it was still coming up positive but I just crawled back into bed as this was a bit too deja vu for me from our last cycle. Hammer got up to get ready for work. (I had decided to take the day off) He came out of the bathroom and said, "You know this is darker, like significantly darker." I had to look at it myself but yes it was definitely significantly darker. But I was having cramps and the brown discharge continued, actually got worse when I put in that darn suppository.
  • Around 8:00 am called my clinic to tell them what was happening knowing that they don't open until 8:30 am. I told them I would wait to get the blood drawn in case they wanted to add in an order for progesterone. When it was nearly 10 am, I could not stand it anymore and just drove to the lab. I had decided to try a new one that was attached to a local hospital that promised stat labs. Just after I had checked in at the lab the clinic called. She reassured me that as long as it was brown it was ok and that lots of women start to get irritated by the suppositories about now. So they were not going to check my progesterone but did state that if my value came back at at least 100 they might drop me down to 2 times per day instead of 3. I was called back shortly after I hung up and made sure to tell the staff several times that the beta was stat and the TSH and t4 were not. The phlebotomist said it was no problem but if I hadn't heard by 2pm to call the lab. Well 3pm rolled around and my clinic had not called so I rang the lab and found out that they hadn't run my beta yet because it wasn't put in as stat. AH! Seriously! After being firm with them they said they would run it right away. About an hour later my clinic called.
  • Beta #1 = 96 - The RN reassured me that I made their cut off of 100 because more than likely by the end of today I am 100. But man, by the skin of my teeth. Just to be safe they are keeping me on the Endometrin 3x/d until my repeat on Wednesday. It is hard to be super excited having gone through a blighted ovum and a missed miscarriage but I guess the first hurdle is just getting pregnant, yet we have many more to come in the next few weeks. Please be praying for it to double by this Wednesday. I am still having spotting but it is staying brown and it does seem to be connected to the suppositories. We did compare this to our blighted ovum cycle and today at 15dp3dt (18dp0) I am 96 compared to 17dp3dt (20 dpo) I was at 107. So hopefully that is a good sign.

13 comments:

Hillary said...

So thankful you made it through that first (huge) hurdle and have a positive beta!! Praying for doubling and a sticky pregnancy!

makingmemom.blogspot.com

BB said...

Let the miracle keep growing! Thinking of you all! {HUGS}

Melissa said...

Praying hard that your beta doubles

kdactyl said...

I know there has been a lot of stress involved for you these past few days with the spotting and the darker/not darker lines on those darn HPTs....BUT...I smiled through this entire post because I swear I could have written this myself....GIRL!!!!! You are PREGNANT!!!!! I know history has not been kind to you here (it wasnt' to me either)...but oh ...YOU ARE PREGNANT.... and your beta is better than mine ever were!!!!! AND I have two babies!!!! Oh yay...yay....yay....I know it is sooo hard to get excited ... you want to guard your heart...but oh this is sooooo exciting! Lots and lots of baby dust and prayers coming to you. I remember these first weeks way too vividly and all the crap that goes with it...but hey...not only did I have the brown gook...but I full on bled several times with my daughter and it all worked out. Those suppositories are ruthless to your lady bits and your cervix is certifiably friable at this stage in pregnancy as all those new blood vessels are being created to suppor that baby! Oh...I wish I weren't at work...I would be jumping for joy for you right now! Hang on...it is a wild, but fun ride and you have crossed the toughest barrier....

Hugs,

Karaleen

Shannon said...

Praying like crazy for you!

Mandy said...

I know it's scary given your past, but I still have high hopes for you. Praying it doubles and that this baby grows big and strong for the next 9 months!

JB said...

This is GREAT news so far! SO happy for you to make it this far. Fingers and toes will be crossed for the next few steps (and the next 9.5 months!) to be smooth and perfect...

RELH said...

Thinking about you.

Allison said...

I don't think I have any words that will make you feel better, so please just know I'm praying for and thinking about you. I hope your beta doubles and you (finally) get some good news.

Kelly said...

Really hoping for great numbers on your next beta. Thinking of you :)

Nicole said...

holy roller coaster 2ww! But that last little bullet point ended with a 96!! WOOT WOOT! I know you are very understandably nervous, but at least it's good news so far! :) Can't wait for goo news about the next beta too
PS- suppositories suck. (but not as much as POI). I'll be on them again in three weeks :(

Lindsey said...

What a crazy ride! Praying that your beta will double and that your baby will grow strong and healthy!!

keepingmyeyesonjesus said...

Congratulations! I know the spotting is very scary, I also had it with this pregnancy, and if you've had a miscarraige before it's even scarier, but there are times where it does work out! I am hoping and praying this one works out, its high time for you!