Wednesday, August 26, 2009

I Would Like to File a Missing Persons Report Please.

My Aunt is missing. I was expecting her to arrive early this week but it's now Wednesday and she is no where to be found. She's normally very punctual which is what is alarming me most. I even took precautions and sent her some prometrium to ensure that she would get her safely and on time. Here is a picture of her below to help in the search.


Her name is Flow, I refer to her by Aunt Flow but she also responds to Dirty Hag or Wicked Witch of the South.




While you are at it could you also be on the look out for my mind? I seemed to have misplaced it some where and I would really like it back. Apparently the side effects of prometrium for me are forgetfulness and lack of focus. This comes at an inopportune time for me. Right now my job requires me to be very detailed and focused and I am not. Not only that but I can barely remember what day of the week it is. And if some one tells me, don't be surprised if I forget within 30 minutes. I have literally been driving to a friends house and forgot where I was going. I had to drive back home because Hammer didn't answer his phone to tell me what I was supposed to be doing. That is not normal people. I have triple booked our weekends and had to reschedule things, left the dog outside for almost an hour in the heat before I realized it, and the list goes on. Actually I can't remember the other things I've done to even tell you. It's hilarious that with all the drugs I've been on the two that bother me the most are this prometrium and the birth control pills. Which I would love to start here, any day now.



But in good news my last Bravelle angel (thank you again jvwaiting!) sent me a blessing of the remaining vials of stims that I needed for IVF#2. Once I finally get my period I'll be able to get my day 3 FSH drawn and the rest of my drugs ordered. I tried to see if they would order them earlier but no go. It wasn't a waste of a call. Apparently the lab never told the clinic that Hammer's backup deposit was on ice. Our clinic requires couples to have back up 'boys' in case something were to happen like stage fright or hospitalization. I'm glad we got that cleared up at least. Now all we have to do is wait for Aunt Flow to make her final curtain call.

9 comments:

Simple said...

OMG .. thanks a million for the laugh today! I really needed it (more than you know!) .. I'll put out the APB for your aunt ;)

JB said...

Ugh, that bitch! I am waiting, too, for her to show her wretched face. I want to start my #2! I have a fridge full of drugs and I am ready to shoot 'em up! (She's probably out whoring herself to people who DON'T want to see her, when for once we really do!)

JB said...

Oh, and my deepest sympathies, as I've lost my mind on any type of progesterone I ever took...I walk from one room to the next all day and wonder what I went in there for...or pull out a sticky note and by the time I pick up the pen, forget what I was about to write....I call it Infertile's Dementia!

Astrid said...

Thanks for your comment, this post is HILARIOUS!!! You're adorable. I can relate too but I don't have all those drugs as an excuse. I blame age and my wine habit. I hope Aunt Flow gets here soon! I know how badly she can be missed despite her reputation.

Hoping for our own Peanut said...

come on aunt flo! pay mrs. hammer a visit so she can get this baby makin' show on the road!!

Hillary said...

I'm on the lookout! :)

makingmemom.blogspot.com

Sassy said...

My Auntie Florence has gone all wonky on me lately as well. Last time she visited, she only stayed two days.

Haha, I didn't mind.

Shannon said...

Your post made me laugh, I love your humor about this situation. Im praying she shows up soon so you can start your pills!

barrenandbelieving said...

ha! That was great, the picture of "her" made me laugh the most.

Any luck finding her? I always have to coax her out with a little candy-coated provera ;)