Thursday, October 15, 2009

It’s My Birthday, I Can Panic If I Want To (updated)

Today I turn 31 years old. Today I got a call that I will have a 3 day transfer tomorrow. Today no one has yet told me how my embryos are doing just that I am to come in for the transfer. Do they not know what that does to a girl hopped up on a ton of hormones? Or that it’s my birthday and of all things I should get a report on how they are doing, today of all days?

Of course doing a 3 day transfer instead of a 5 day transfer puts me into a state of panic that almost all of them arrested overnight and were back down to just a few. Then I go into flash backs of our last cycle which was a big FAIL. I have nothing to base this on though. And there is nothing I can do about any of it either. Which is why type A me went into panic mode.

To top things off my acupuncturist is out of town so I had to call around to a couple of places to see if someone could get me in at last notice. Nobody was calling me back = more panic. But finally I got someone who was willing. I will have a treatment today and then post transfer tomorrow because that was the best she could do. I’ll take it.

God bless my mom who, when I called her with the news (after I called Hammer of course), started singing Blessed Assurance to me over the phone. I needed someone to talk me back down into reality. Now if I could put her in a little box on my desk at work to keep me focused on the fact that God is in control then I would be set.

***Update***
As is my typical style I panic way too early than is necessary. Maybe that is why God keeps teaching me lessons on trust. Right after I posted I got a call from the lab. Their grading scale is the following:

Day 2 should show 2-4 calls and they grade on a scale of 1-5 with 1 being the best.

We have:

1 – 4 cell grade 2
1 – 3 cell grade 2
3 – 2 cell grade 2
1 – 2 cell grade 4
1 – 4 cell grade 4

So basically 5 of the 7 are looking good. They will keep an eye on the last two that are grade 4 but they are not “looking good” right now per their words. I’m just so glad to hear that they are all growing well. I hope that at least one of them wants to stick around for a while.

14 comments:

Laurie A said...

I'm just a blog reader. My daughter is currently 17 weeks pregnant after infertility, miscarriage and ultimately a sucessful IVF. I began reading blogs because of her struggle. My prayers are with you. Your Mom is right, Jesus is in control. Just remember to trust him.

JB said...

Focus, girl! You have a transfer scheduled! That's good! It's going to be alright. Remain calm...so easy to say, right? Try real hard...I'll be thinking of you.

Jenny said...

Yay! I know it is hard to gain control of your thoughts in times like these, just take it one hour at a time. Good Luck!

Happy birthday to you! It's a great day for birthday....It's mine too. Plus, I know 3 other people who celebrate today, two being a sister-in-law and my late grandpa.

Shannon said...

Happy Birthday!

I love that your mom sang to you. Moms have a way of calming us when the panic sets in.

Im glad that your report came back good, I have so much hope for you this cycle. You are at the top of my IF prayer list and I wont stop praying until you are blessed with your miracle.

Thinking of you!

I sought the Lord, and he answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. (Psalm 34:4)

Tabitha said...

That is so incredibly adorable that your mother sang blessed assurance to you, I LOVE that. How special! I'm praying hard for your little embryos and can't wait to hear how the transfer goes!!! (((HUGS)))

BB said...

Wishing you loads of luck for tomorrow! Sticky vibes your way! Happy Birthday to you... I hope that this is a special birthday for you to remember!

kdactyl said...

This sounds really good to me! I only got 5 to fertilize out of nine and then two looked great and two looked okay and the 5th just kind of peetered out and never got past 3-4 cells. But....from those (they transferred all 4 on a three day transfer due to my age -40 at the time)....now I have a beautiful 18 month old son. I feel so positive for you....this all sounds like great numbers from my own experience and your young age really works in your favor. I am praying for you like mad!
kd

Hoping for our own Peanut said...

Happy Birthday! Things are lookin' good for you guys..what a great present! Good luck tomorrow!

Mrz. Hannah Myhre said...

The Report looks really good!!
And Happy Birthday:) thinking of you.

Hannah

Simple said...

What a cool birthday present - 5 embies waiting for you! Hold on for the transfer - sending you lots 'o positive vibes!!!! ;)

Allison said...

Happy birthday! Will be saying prayers for you tomorrow!!!!

Hillary said...

Happy birthday! Great report -- I'm glad the panic was quickly calmed through God's love (through your mom) and a quick phone call from the lab.

makingmemom.blogspot.com

Brittney said...

Happy Birthday!!! Hope it was a great one. I am praying for you and your precious embryos - don't give up hope yet!:) God is absolutely in control. Try to lean into Him and surrender all of this to Him if you can...He will give you a true peace like no other. SO excited for your transfer!! Take good care of yourself until then - you deserve it.

Jocelyn said...

Happy belated birthday (I am a day late...) Sounds like things are going okay with you - praying that your little embryos keep dividing and doing what they are suppose to do. There are so many ups and downs it's not even fair, but you are having a transfer done!!!! Praying everything goes well!!